Sunday, January 24, 2010
my bday is coming but i juz dunno y i juz cnt sense e sense of happiness?? i dun even hav e mood or feel happy or even excited for tis coming bday... frens ard me hav been counting down infront of me but i'm totally unaware when is my bday... i dunno y juz dun hav e feeling of looking forward to it... omg... wat really happen to me??
i dunno mayb recently i'm really mad?? i noe my temper hav nt been rather ok recently... having mood swing tis few days... but ppl ard me seems to b e challenge for me... they lyk testing my patience... pls... how u expect me to hav gd temper wif ppl talking tings tat r contradicting n oso provoking me?? i'm nt a god... everyone hav their limits too... mayb my limits recently is getting lower... but i alr try to control my temper... juz dun get it y sm ppl juz wun auto... e mre i'm controlling e mre they provoke me =.= den wat u all expect me to do?? seriously tell me... i hav no idea how to handle situation lyk tis anymre... tings r repeating n i really sick n tired of tinking ways to settle it... all i cn say nw tat will pls them is putting all e blame on myself... okok... i'm defeated everyone... is juz all my fault...
smtimes hav been tinking m i e only loner in tis world?? today morning went to tiong bahru to settle my dad's cashcard... aft tat went to tiong bahru plaza to hav sm walk... at first tot of gg thr to shop n c if thr's any suitable clothes i could buy for new yr... but when i walk in i juz dun hav e mood... walking ard e mall aimlessly n juz feel sad... seeing ppl ard me at least hav a companion to talk to n wat abt me?? seeing ppl smile happily infront of me but y cnt i b e same as them?? aft tat i took mrt n go serangoon gdn to buy bread for my mum... looking ard at e ppl ard me gives me e lonely feel agn... i dunno y i juz hav e feeling of crying... i so wish to juz find a corner to cry... but i didn't... coz in tis world who cares?? nobody would even care den wat for shd i b crying?? haiz... really finding so pointless to live on...
Labels: contradict contradict contradict... is juz wat i got...
This is how all things worked...
2:02 AM
